It’s official; we’re really getting married! Our invitations went in the mail this week and I can hardly believe we’re finally there. For the first time since the engagement, I’ve been hit with a wave of “oh wow, this is really happening!” I keep joking to Tim that now it’s too late for him to change his mind. He’s stuck with me!
The guest list, and in turn invitations, have been an interesting part of wedding planning these past few months. Being pretty naïve, I thought it would be a piece of cake since we’d talked about it all in advance. I went into our planning with three guidelines: no seating chart, no kids, and no “extras.”
Tim and I are minglers and friend musher-togetherers. We’re the couple who frequently makes all of our friends from different circles hang out together in hopes that they’ll all be come friends as well. What can I say? We just want all of our awesome friends to be awesome together! Because of this we decided to go for a cocktail-style reception. This means no seated dinner (and therefore no dreaded seating chart!). The Varsity Theater is incredibly conducive to this style of wedding since it is comprised of tons of nooks and crannies and fun places for guests to mingle and enjoy themselves.
The second “easy” decision for us was to have a kid-free wedding. One of the best things about the Loring Pasta Bar and Varsity Theater is that not only do they allow open flames, but they provide and light hundreds of candles for us. Consequently, it doesn’t make for a kid-friendly environment. I’ve heard a lot of brides-to-be stressing out about this issue in fear that they will offend friends and family. We felt this pressure too, and in the end decided to stay strong to our no-kids policy, but allowed our immediate family to bring their children. Compromise! It’s a magical wedding word.
And what about the no extras rule? This was a reminder to us that at the end of the day it’s our wedding, and we have to make some tough decisions. Venues have limits to the number of people who can attend, of course. Which, for us, meant that in order to invite everyone who we truly wanted there, we had to be stringent with our plus ones and “and Guests”. Funny how even though we knew what we wanted, it was still very difficult! What if someone has a new significant other–should they be invited? What about the single friend traveling from a few states away? I absolutely hate to cause any kind of conflict or offend anyone, so this really was difficult. Luckily my fiancé is much more level headed, and helped me make some tough calls. At the end of the day we hope that all of our guests are excited to be there regardless.
There were talks about how many people we can truly invite, how many we can expect not to show up, and debates about if coworkers count as friends or a separate category. I re-worded my invite list at least five times because I couldn’t decide if it should say “Mr. and Mrs.,” or if I could just address invites to people the way we normally refer to them.
As usual, I eventually made a decision and decided not to look back. Invites are addressed the way that we would want them addressed to us. Our invite list went up a little in numbers, so I guess we’ll all just have to get cozy. I was amazed at how much work this turned out to be, but now that the invites are sent and we’re starting to get reply cards I am just extremely excited. In only six short weeks Tim and I will be getting married with the most amazing people in the world celebrating with us!